A one-time performance by the touring Argentinian group, "Tango Buenos Aires" was as invigorating as it was eloquently graceful! Presented in the stunning, historical Auditorium Theater in Chicago's downtown, the theatre interior rivaled the beauty of the dancers. Built in 1889, and acquired by Roosevelt University some years ago, the theatre hosts a wide array of traveling shows from all over the world. Exquisitely gilded and brilliantly lit, the theatre holds over three thousand in its audience and commands a high standing among Chicago's illustrious theatres, with First Lady Michelle Obama residing as honorary chair.
The performance itself was rich in tradition as spinning couples traced the floor in group dances which were not only reminiscent of the history of the Spanish tango, but hinted at a worldwide similarity in communal expression through dance. The dances themselves paid homage to that legendary Argentinian lady Eva Peron, featuring the ballad "Don't Cry for Me Argentina," from the musical based on her life, and following her progression from young girl through her singular political career.
Highlighting the evening was a dance performed solely by the men, who became a part of the music through the rhythmic use of the boleador, a slingshot-like tool reminiscent of a lasso. The boleador is a tool traditionally put to use in Argentina to help in rounding up cattle. However in this instance, the men held one in each hand and swung them around quickly in the manner of a jump rope. As the end of the boleador reached the floor, the resultant tapping was masterfully used to create rhythms even as the boleador span around the men in dexterous patterns amazing to behold.
A beautiful event, rich in culture and refreshingly artistic, Tango Buenos Aires is an experience to remember!
Plastic Revolution is a funny and campy musical comedy that takes place in 1950s Kissimmee, Florida about a recently widowed suburbanite, Delores Clarke, who meets an enthusiastic and pioneering Tupperware saleswoman named Brownie Wise. Together these two gals revolutionize the sales process by introducing the concept of “Tupperware parties” as a hugely successful sales tool for the Tupperware Corporation that captured the imagination and excitement of freedom from time consuming everyday chores and sold it to the average housewife.
The other ‘Stepford Wives” in the neighborhood fear Clarke at first thinking that because she is single she is out to steal their husbands! But after realizing that Tupperware really does free those from the slavery of cooking dinner for their families every night of the week (leftovers!) and also could provide a source of income they hold up Delores and Brownie as their heroines and start on a new way of life.
I really loved that the lead “Stepford Wife” named Lilah who warns the other women that this revolution is going to ruin their family lives and undermine their role as housewives was cast with a man in drag. Danny Taylor turned an absolutely hysterical, yet “straight” comedic performance in this role and has a beautiful, expressive singing voice to boot!
Sasha Smith in the lead role of Delores Clarke has a wonderful rich singing voice as well and a sweet quality that really endears the audience to her from the very first scene. Cassie Thompson as Brownie Wise has a great frenetic sense of physical comedy that reminds you that women of that time period began using diet pills and speed in order to get all their mind numbingly boring chores and lonely housework done!
I thought the music and comedy were each very enjoyable and that the production comes with a nice blend of parody/camp and feminist musical comedy.
In their seventh season, this is The New Colony’s Theater Company’s first production in The Den Theatre as their new permanent performance space, alongside The Hypocrites and the Irish Theater of Chicago. Plastic Revolution is being performed at Den Theatre through February 22nd. For more information and/or tickets, visit thedentheatre.com or call 773-413-0862.
*Photo - (front, left to right) Cassie Thompson and Sasha Smith with (back, left to right) Elise Mayfield, Lizzie Schwarzrock, Daeshawna Cook and Danny Taylor in The New Colony’s world premiere musical PLASTIC REVOLUTION. Photo by Ryan Bourque.
No , I haven’t read the book 50 Shades of Grey, only portions of it - while standing in the grocery store, but still I was swept up by the excitement of Broadway Playhouse’s mostly female audience who giddily lined up to see this show as if they were going to get to meet their own Mr. Grey in person.
Several of the musical parody numbers in this production got solid laughs on almost every beat and punchline, including the hysterical, “There’s a Hole Inside of Me “, “I Don’t Make Love , I F-ck!”, “Just Like any Other Couple” and “How Much Can I Take?”. I really loved the way the three women reading the book together at a book club were the chorus for the show, interjecting their breathless responses to the action between Anastasia Steele and Grey the way the real fans of this book attempt to live out the fantasy in their own lonely lives.
I also enjoyed the way the parody shows both sides of the S & M world by showing that much of it is harmless fun and role play fantasy but that some of it is brought about by serious sexual dysfunction and or abuse, like revealing that Grey is into S & M because he was “sexually molested by an older woman from the ages of 15 to 21”.
Ben Caplan as the plus-sized Christian Grey clad in a sickly revealing, red and white muscle builders unitard with a full on barrel tummy was hysterical, delivering his song and dance numbers with great physical comedic timing.
Diego Klock Perez was also very funny in his role as “Jose” the Latin lover who hopes to steal Steele’s heart from the dominating and untouchable Grey. Klock got great laughs just by his entrance and exit from the stage each time leaving Anastasia’s presence without losing her eye contact by backing slowing out of the room one deep step/lunge at a time.
Katie Lamark has a great singing voice and was very funny and cute as the befuddled and enamored Anastasia Steele. But the real scene stealer for me was Carol from the chorus of three ladies’ book club played by Melanie Brook. She really reminded me of a young Carol Burnett and when I saw how young she is in person after the show I was even more impressed that she was able to pull off playing a dowdy, nerdy desperate woman in her fifties with such uncanny comedic accuracy.
The three piece band onstage was perfect for this show, it was lively and effective yet felt casual and fun. However, the set could use some real sprucing up as there was none to speak of and I think everyone was a little disappointed there was not even a backdrop painted to suggest Grey’s opulent million dollar home nor the trappings of his infamous “Red Room”.
Other than that though this was a really fun and sexy evening of entertainment because it made the whole audience feel that sex and different kinds of sex can be talked about openly and laughed at and even relished in public without anyone being offended or belittled, male OR female, fat OR thin, sexy or nerdy. This fun and funny musical parody about America’s new obsession with soft core S & M strikes many of the right notes, no pun intended.
50 Shades! The Musical Parody is only playing at Broadway Playhouse through January 18th, so take advantage of this funny show while you still can. For more information, visit www.BroadwayinChicago.com.
Holidaze really is like nothing you’ve seen before, especially during the traditional Holiday season offerings like The Nutcracker. The international cast members from many countries including Italy, Mongolia, Asia, Ukraine, and Ethiopia were extremely gifted in each of their unique disciplines. The magnificent Chicago Theater was a perfect venue for such a show.
The sister contortionists, aerialists, silks artists, chair stackers, and clowns all did so many different things all at the same time onstage and in the air that it was difficult to really take it all in!
One dancer did a balancing and juggling routine while lying on a slanted bench where at one point she literally was doing a different and independent action with each of her four limbs, Her right foot was twirling hula hoops, while her right foot balanced a rolling boll, her right hand was juggling and her left hand doing some other equally amazing task. This and all the acts really make you realize what an awesome creation the human body is and what seemingly miraculous feats it is capable of with the right talent and cultivation.
The costumes were for the most part spectacular but occasionally I thought they went a little too comical (reindeer unitards and old Mrs. Santa Claus) instead of balletic and took some of the dignity away from what were amazingly graceful and dignified performances.
Also the hypnotic, repetitive music soundtrack needs an updating as it gave everything kind of a 1990’s Euro-House Music feel that was dazzling at first but became a little overwhelming and confusing by the end of the first act.
One other note I have for the producers of this particular cast is the presence of a very young, tiny aerialist/ballet dancer who appeared to be about 6-7 years old. She was a brilliant ballerina who could very easily be playing the lead in The Nutcracker, but in this show she was trussed up in a very strange halter type contraption and pushed around the stage by a man on stilts. I felt very uncomfortable watching someone so young performing this way and doing contortionism at all when her body is so flexible because it is still forming.
To make sure I was not overreacting, I leaned over to a friend and asked what he thought and his first response was, “Creepy! Like watching child abuse!” I agree, this act needs to be placed on the ground like the other young 9-year old dancer in the show and re-costumed as children should never be costumed in something that even resembles a restraint of any kind.
Other than that this was a refreshing and spectacular night of amazement, suspense and bursting at the seams with psychedelic Christmas colors and lighting effects that I will never forget.
Almost as funny as it is tragic (that sounds so wrong), The Ruffians’ Burning Bluebeard, currently running at Theatre Wit, is a very unique live performance that everyone should experience. Bluebeard is an ensemble piece that recreates the stage performance that took place during the famous 1903 Iroquois Theater fire that claimed over 600 lives on Randolph Street in downtown Chicago.
The moment we enter the stage area, we are met with body bags that lie on a charred theater floor. It is a melancholy scene that sends chills up one’s spine. We soon are introduced to five stage performers and a theater manager who each tell their story of what they were doing at the time the fire struck. This happens in between the recreation of acts leading up to the tragedy. During this process we laugh and laugh some more. How can there be something funny found in something so disastrous? Masterfully, playwright Jay Torrence is able to infuse a dark humor throughout this tragic historical event. Each character delivers a knockout performance drawing laughs at will from the crowd one moment and bringing tears to one’s eyes the next.
One of the year’s best, this show is like no other. Its vivid descriptiveness relates to the audience to the point you really feel you know the characters and are experiencing the tragedy along with them. Grim and morose is the story though comical are many of the surrounding facts such as the Mr. Bluebeard itself, the massively produced play with over four hundred cast members that was running at the time of the great fire. A play that hardly made any sense and depended on large visuals, an overload of song numbers (nine songs in first act alone) and dazzling acrobatics.
We are described beautifully the stunning details of the sixteen hundred seat Iroquois Theater, a majestic auditorium with no costs spared during its creation that was touted as fireproof just as the Titanic was called unsinkable nine years later. The sad truths are slowly released whereas mostly women and children were in attendance at this standing room only matinee performance, and that the theater was nearly escape proof once the fire erupted.
Wonderfully directed by Halana Kays, Burning Bluebeard makes exceptional use of its limited space, successfully creating the illusion of a much larger scaled production. Ensemble members Pam Chermansky and author Jay Torrence lead the way delivering mesmerizing performances in this multi-talented and very colorful cast with Anthony Courser, Molly Plunk, Leah Urzendowski and Ryan Walters. And thanks to imaginative costume design, we have no problem believing we are present at a 1903 production.
In Burning Bluebeard we are treated to a rare flavor of theatre that is sure to leave a lasting impression.
Oriental Theatre - From the opening of the show when Chicago actor Ed Kross comes out and explains in a perfect 50’s TV announcer voice that we are all at a live taping of the Lucy Show back in 1952, I was captivated.
Two real episodes of the show were purchased for this production, “The Benefit” and “Lucy has her eyes examined.” I thought both episodes were perfectly chosen not just for their comedic effect but because they showed clearly how far ahead of her time Lucille Ball and her husband Desi Arnaz were by creating the three camera filming process and Lucy being the first female studio owner, way, way ahead of their time! I adored the bright, honest yet sardonic tone of the antics of the ensemble who lovingly recreated the between scene period TV commercials for classic products Brylcreem and Alka Seltzer. Rick Sparks staging is spot on and is very fun and exciting to watch as the entire cast and crew move seamlessly from introducing the show to setting off the applause sign for us , the live studio audience. It really felt like we were transported back in time to 1950s Los Angeles and were waiting breathlessly to see these two huge iconic stars in the flesh for the first time.
Lori Hammel as Ethel and Kevin Remington as Fred Mertz were very funny, very well cast and true to their characters. It is interesting to note that the real Vivian Vance playing Ethel originally objected to the 20 year plus age difference between her and her TV husband Fred! I always wondered why her husband was so much older and less attractive than the handsome couple they were best friends with but that was pretty typical for the time period.
Thea Brooks did a fantastic job playing the most difficult role in this show. Brooks really captured the absolutely brilliant physical comedy and genuine dancers grace with which Lucille Ball (originally a Broadway quality dancer) was able to bestow upon female comedy timing in a world which had yet to enter fully in the women’s movement at all.
The wonderful, best friends forever interaction between Lucy and Ethel reminded us that Lucy was also ahead of her time not only by marrying interracially, but Lucille Ball was also the first champion of long lasting, devoted, female friendship, now referred to as “chicks before dicks!” at a time when both issues were severely frowned upon and questioned by society.
Euriamis Losada as Ricky blew audiences away with his eerily accurate portrayal of Ricky Ricardo’s movements and voice! Every single line of comedy and each line of his musical numbers were so like the original I occasionally squinted my eyes and felt I could see Lucy and Desi standing on the stage. These two performances were so difficult and required much attention to detail by Brooks and Losada, yet they pulled it off without bordering on caricature or parody regarding these two beloved superstars. Thea Brooks and Euriamis Losada displayed real STAR turns in this production and I can’t wait to see their future incarnations on Broadway in other productions.
I only have two notes for this delightful and thoroughly enjoyable production. It would have been nice if instead of the “game show break” utilizing an audience member and plant in the audience which separated the two episodes, Sparks had just allowed us, the studio audience, to take a ten minute intermission. Also, I would have loved to see a single behind the scenes scene between Lucy and Ricky AS Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz, to peer into that break from the fantasy of the show to the reality of their rocky but ground breaking marriage. It would have been very special to witness indeed and have allowed Losada and Brooks to peel back and show yet another layer of these two magnificently complicated performers in their own time period.
I highly recommend seeing I Love Lucy Live on Stage at the Oriental Theatre with your whole family to bring back the love and simplicity and also the hysterical hypocrisy of the time period that many of us grew up watching and loving.
"But how does one know if they've gone mad?" asks Alice of the elusive Cheshire Cat as he swings on a rail, hanging twenty feet off the ground. "You see, a dog growls when it's angry, and wags its tail when it's pleased," he answers. "Now, I growl when I'm pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry." He grins and disappears, leaving a baffled Alice to contemplate the difference between madness and sanity, the similarities they share, and whether or not they might just be one in the same.
Set in the alternate world that exists beyond – or through – the parlor mirror, Lookingglass Alice is based on Lewis Carroll's sequel to the ever-familiar Alice's Adventures in Wonderland: Through the Looking-Glass. So instead of going down the rabbit hole, we literally step through the looking-glass into a dreamy (and sometimes nightmarish) world of opposites, nonsense, and whimsy, as if we too have dozed off after a game of chess and awake to find a new dimension waiting for us above the fireplace mantle.
With or without its befitting name, the Lookingglass Theatre couldn't be a more apt setting in which to tell this tale, with its open, industrial structure taking the viewer out of the space of traditional theatre and promising something more immediate and exciting.
Part children's entertainment, part Cirque du Soleil, part vicarious drug trip, Alice takes the audience on a journey simultaneously magical and dark, funny and frightening, alarming and calming, and above all, surreal. Characters have different proportions through the looking-glass, some excessively tall, some uncharacteristically small; one can run fast for hours and wind up in the very same spot from which they started; Red Queens float on umbrellas in the ocean; cats play with oversized balls of yarn (or is it you who are under-sized?); Alice spins so fast on a suspended hoop you don't know which end is her head and which are her legs – the visual equivalent of how both the audience and the heroine feel after their disorienting passage into the world within the mirror.
A very physical show, Alice is the sort of spectacle meant to be enjoyed by all types of audiences. Young children might be best left at home – the loud noises, confusion, and surreality of it all can be a little overwhelming – but it's undoubtable that physical feats like continuous two-person backflips, the lifting and balancing of actors as though they were weightless, and an anxious finale where Alice wraps herself in ropes mid-air and falls without hitting the ground will impress adults, teens, and kids alike.
Remarkably executed by a vastly talented five-person cast, Alice is less a play than it is an experience. It's colorful and unpredictable. What it lacks in plot, it makes up for in intrigue. Where it forgets logic, it remembers absurdity. You may run in place for ninety minutes and end up in the self-same spot, but you'll have gained a gleeful acceptance of your own madness and the insight that our world is not always as it looks.
Lookingglass Alice, directed by David Catlin, is playing at the Water Tower Water Works space at 821 N Michigan Ave through February 15th, 2015.
Instead of spending the night in watching “Dancing with the Stars”, “So You Think You Can Dance”, or even “American Idol”, there is a stage where you can experience the costumes, the beauty, and the grace of live ballroom dancing and competition with the control of the vote in your hands at the Cadillac Palace Theater and “Dancing Pros Live.”
The backdrop of the intimate and classical theater was an ideal location for guests to feel part of the all ages appropriate show. For those who are familiar with our ever growing passion for reality television and fantastic performances, this was an interactive experience not to be missed. Hosted by Alan Thicke (whom we all know and love from ‘Growing Pains’) and Joanna Pacitti (an “American Idol” Alum, who treats the audience to a few songs, also joined on the stage by Angel Taylor from “The Voice”) the show follows a format we have all come to know and love; 5 couples are competing for the title of “Dance Pros” through 2 rounds of ballroom dance (Interpretive and Technical,) the winner is then determined and awarded the title based on the collected and tallied audience vote.
Although some of the names of the performers may be familiar to our dancing fans, like Judges Edyta Sliwinska from DWTS and choreographer Oscar Orosco (You Got Served,) dancer Chelsie Hightower from DWTS, as well as top 6 finalist Ryan Dilello from SYTYCD; The other featured performers are not to forgotten, as all are finalists and title holders themselves within the ballroom dance world (television and competive); Regina Maziarz a US 10 Dance Champion, Paul Barris winner of Latin American DWTS, Antonina Skobina the 2012 US National Champion are just to name a few.
Before each competitive dance by the 5 competitive couples, the audience experiences 3-4 different tableaus of each dance style featured (cha-cha, samba, foxtrot…) and then watch each couple perform 2 routines. Based off of short interviews given of each couple, come together as long as 8 years and others as short as 24 hours, these dancers compete to win the audience’s vote.
For those who love dance, reality television, those who are interested in finding out a little bit more, or even if you just love voting for your favorite performers from home, Dancing Pros Live is an event and experience that every couple can enjoy or even the whole family can get into.
Did I not say it was going to be a crazy season? The Texans start week 4, with a 3-0 record. Tom Brady is benched and E.J. Manuel, QB of the Bills was replaced by Kyle Orton. The craziness is not over either, wait until week 5 update. Enjoy Week 4 folks. I hope this is not too long for you guys. Sorry in advance. No I'm not. lol.
NEW YORK GIANTS VS. WASHINGTON REDSKINS
The headlines are saying, "Eli Manning looks like a "10" again." They say the numbers don't tell the story of how good he was in the 45-14, whose your daddy now win that they put on Washington, for everybody to see on TNF. His teammates said that they knew it was only a matter of time before they saw Eli do what he do. I watched some of it but to be honest, I tuned in to "Scandal" and "How To Get Away With Murder" along with 47.5 million other people. So I can't really comment much on what happened. Just keeping it real people. So the Giants are at a 2-2 record now and this could be the start of a much needed turn around for them. Like another 2-2 team I know. I'm not saying any names, lol. I'm just telling the NFC East that the Giants have put you guys on notice. The article I read about Washington said that it does not matter who the QB is. It won't make all of the problems that the Redskins are having. A dreadful defense, a shambles of an offensive line whose members seem offended by the very idea of pass protection, LMAO, that is too funny. Even funnier, A diabolical special teams that gives away big plays as though they are prizes in a raffle. I could go on and on and believe me, the last few lines weren't mines but they are masterfully put. Plus they got some really meaty, can hardly move guys too. Just throwing my 2 cents worth of observations in. Let's see what the Giants do next. E. Manning threw for 300yds, 4 TDs + 1 he ran in himself = 5 and 1 int. A. Williams had 15 carries for 66yds & 1 TD. V. Cruz had 6 receptions for 108yds. K. Cousins threw for 257yds, 1 TD and OUCH, 4 ints. A. Morris had 12 carries for 63yds & 1 TD. R. Helu had 5 receptions for 78yds.
NEW ENGLAND PATRIOT'S VS. KANSAS CITY CHIEFS
I bet you didn't see this coming. K.C. Chiefs 41-14 over the New England Patriots. It was so bad, one reporter asked Belichick if the QB position would be evaluated this week, he just laughed at that fool. I did watch some of this game, it was not entertaining and Brady did not do his usual thing, I like when he plays well, it's great to watch. Brady was taken out of the game late in the 4th Qtr and gave rookie QB Jimmy Garoppolo a chance to wet his beak. They asked Belichick why he put the rookie in the game, he said he played all team members tonight. I guess with a spanking like that, you can spread the hurt around. At the beginning of the season, Brady was asked about how long he'd like to play, he said, "When I suck, I'll retire." I'm just saying Tom, you sucked on this Monday night. For Kansas, Jamall Charles returned from an injury to score 3 TDS. Brady did get picked twice, this was one of the worst losses that Belichick has had as the Patriots coach. That's all I have to say about this game. T. Brady threw for 159yds, 1TD & 2 ints. Yep, 159yds, don't adjust your glasses. B. LaFell had 6 receptions for 119yds & 1 TD. A. Smith threw for 248yds & 3 TDs. K. Davis had 16 receptions for 107yds. T. Kelce had 8 receptions for 93yds and 1 TD.
CHICAGO BEARS: 2-2
Last week I was singing, "how sweet it is to be loved by you" now, sadly I'm singing "it's my party and I'll cry if I want to." Yeah, we got our butts handed to us courtesy of the Green Bay Packers. You know how that feels, it just gives you a knot in your stomach. It's like when you are in high school and Joe breaks up with you and then he dates Suzi, the girl that you NEVER wanted to see him with. I would rather lose to Jacksonville than to the Packers. We started off so good, playing good solid football, letting the Packers know, this is our house and we got this. So it's half time, you dancing around the table while you grab a wing or two and you sit down to finish watching and then, outta nowhere, your whole NFL world comes crumbling down. By the end of the game, I was kicking people out my house, not feeding my dogs, not talking to my grand kids, it was just ugly, LOL. I could say there was some bogus calls, but that doesn't account for a 38-17 beat down or 2 interceptions thrown by Cutler or no defense at all, so I won't mention the bogus calls. It was more of only producing a total of 3pts after reaching the 1yd line on two, first half possession to all with all of the previous stuff I mentioned. This is the 189th meeting of the Bears and Packers and as they said Sunday, the Packers got our number. Until we beat them, WITH A.R. playing, we are never going to be legit. Tell me how do you overthrow a 6'6 receiver who has got to be 7feet leaping into the air? So, here we are 2-2, Detroit won to add more salt to the wound. Rodgers, he told the Green Bay Cheeseheads to RELAX and he did not let them down. He got it started with Jordy Nelson and it was over for my BEARS. But, I don't give up that easy. Can't say that for my brother Chris, he was like, "that's it, until the get rid of Cutler, I'm outta here". I managed to calm him down and he's back on the bus with me and the Bears, lol. The Bears & Packers did make history on Sunday. For only the 2nd time in the 95 year history of the NFL, a regular season game unfolded with no punts. The first one was on September 13, 1992 between the Bills and 49ers. Bennett set a career highs with 9 catches for 1346ds. It was his first 100yd receiving game of his career. He now leads the Bears with 29 receptions for 295yds. Rodgers said he just wanted to remind the fans that it's a long season and that at some point we're going to get it right, he had it all right in this one. A. Rodgers threw for 302yds & 4 TDs. E. Lacy had 17 carries for 48yds & 1 TD. R. Cobb had 7 receptions for 113ydcs & 2 TDs. J. Cutler threw for 256yds, 2 TDs & 2 ints. M. Forte had 23 carries for 122yds. Forte surpassed the 10,000 total yards for his career. He has 10,037. Bennett set a career highs with 9 catches for 1346ds. It was his first 100yd receiving game of his career. He now leads the Bears with 29 receptions for 295yds.
GREEN BAY PACKERS:
Read about the dissection of the Bears by the Packers, 38-17 in the Bears update.
DETROIT LIONS: 3-1
Matt Stafford figured with not having Calving Johnson 100% healthy, he would have to do some of the work himself and he did just that. He threw for 2 TDs and ran in another himself to seal the deal as they took down the Jets, 24-17. This game was a match up of Detroit's top-ranked defense & New York's No. 2. Each team only scored 3pts in the first Qtr, Detroit took the lead into halftime, 17-3 and never looked back. Geno Smith has been struggling since the start of the season and it looks like it's not getting any better. The Jet's fans chanting, "We want Vick", started to gain momentum after Geno threw a 4th Qtr interception. But the powers that be want Geno in there so he is still head of the team. Then, adding disaster to his already bad day, he turned to a fan and yelled the F*%# word while leaving the field. Probably not the smartest thing to do. Of course he apologized later, dont' they always? I think his days are numbered, just my opinion. M. Stafford threw for 293yds & 2 TDS, he also rand one in himself. G. Tate had 8 receptions for 116yds. G. Smith threw for 209yds, 1 TD, 1 int and a potty mouth. C. Ivory had 17 carries for 84yds. G. Salas had 2 receptions for 60yds.
MINNESOTA VIKINGS: 2-2
Everybody winning in the NFC North this week but my Bears. The Vikings beat the Falcons 41-28. I told ATL they was going to need some of those 56pts before it was said and done. The Vikings have play the Packers tonight. It don't really matter to me who wins this one. Bridgewater, with his first career start for the Vikings didn't finish the game but he pretty much had it wrapped up when he left. Hester had 5 receptions for 70yds & 1 TD. T. Bridgewater threw for 317yds, he left the game with an ankle sprang. J. McKinnon had 18 carries for 135yds. J. Wright had 8 receptions for 132yds. M. Ryan threw for 298yds, 3 TDs & 2 ints. A. Smith had 4 carries for 62yds & 1 TD. J. Jones had 6 receptions for 82yds.
PHILADELPHIA EAGLES: 3-1
The Eagles went into this game, 3-0. The last time they were at 3-0 was in 2004, which was the last time they went to the SB. When the dust cleared and 26-21 pts later, they would leave the day, 3-1 in the NFC East. They still have a grip on first place but the Cowboys are on the tail. They played the SF 49ers, I watched the remainder of this game after watching my Bears go down. I thought for sure the Eagles had this one and they would go into Week 5, 4-0. The 49ers said, not so fast, we still have some time. Kap and the crew were trying to avoid a 3 game skid. The 49ers finally won their first game at their new stadium but thousands of fans left at halftime. Oh yee of little faith. This Sunday, they seemed like the 49ers of last year, unstoppable, well up until it counted. Foles said that they just didn't execute, that's it, that's all, he never offers excuses, he keeps it real. Kap threw for 218yds, 2 TDs & 1 int. He did get sacked 4 times. F. Gore had 24 carries for 119yds & 1 TD. This was his first 100yd game this year. A. Boldin had 5 receptions for 62yds. N. Foles had 195yds and 2 ints. J. Maclin had 4 receptions for 57yds. Darren Sproles had a career best, 82yd punt return for a TD.
DALLAS COWBOYS: 3-1
Timeeee is on my side, yes it is....the Cowboys said they were not worried about their first lost of the season. Since then, they have won 3 more games and is in a tug-of-war for first place with the Eagles after polishing off the Saints, 38-17 and looked good while they did it. Both Terrance Williams and DeMarco Murray had a pair of TDs. Now, I don't know about anybody else, but are the Saints playing that bad or is everyone else playing better than last year. I am not taking way from any to the teams that have beat the Saints but the Saints are NOT the Saints I know. They were trailing Dallas 24-0 at the half. I'm just saying, maybe if Brees and Graham focus more on the game and stop making commercials, they might put some things together. The Saints didn't even score a TD until the 4th Qtr, now, they are tied for last place in the NFC South with, waitttt for itttt, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.Momma said there be days like this. I would love to be a fly on the wall in the Saints locker room. T. Romo threw for 262yds & 3 TDs. D. Murray had 24 carries for 149yds & 2 TDs. Not to mention that Murray is the NFL's leading rusher and he became only the 6th back in NFL history to open the season with 4 consecutive 100yd games. Go DeMarco, it's your birthday, well feels like it anyway, lol. T. Williams had 6 receptions for 77yds & 2 TDs. D. Brees threw for 340yds, 2 TDs & 1 int. K. Robinson had 8 carries for 87yds. J. Graham had 8 receptions for 86yds, 1 TD & 1 fumble. Did he even fumble at all last year? I don't think so. One more loss and I think the Saints can call it a wrap for the year. If the Cowboys are not careful, they might win 12-13 games this year, time will tell.
NEW YORK GIANTS: 2-2
They're alive!!! The Giants are showing signs of life with their 2nd win of the season against the Redskins, 45-14. They did not leave any room for doubt with this one. Read about it in the TNF update.
WASHINGTON REDSKINS: 1-3
Yep, just talked about this a second ago. Read the skinning of the Redskins by the Giants, 45-14 in the TNF update.
NEW ORLEANS SAINTS:1-3
We already know about the dismemberment of the Saints by the Cowboys, 38-17. Read about it in Dallas update.
CAROLINA PANTHERS: 2-2
It's always a sad, sorry day when a former team member helps in a beat down of their former team. That was the case when Steve Smith had 7 catches for 139yds & 2 TDs in the Ravens 38-10 win over the Panthers. Revenge is best served with TDs.... Smith was with the Panthers for 13 seasons and was released during the off season to cut cost. He proved he is not ready to go out to pasture just yet. He is the oldest player in NFL history with 400yds in his first 4 games. They asked him how was he going to celebrate the day, he said, watch some film, eat some apple pie and call it a day. This man is 35yrs old, that's 55 in NFL years, lol, but he still managed to get it done. I know they are still saying Cam is hurt, then why won't he sit down, you are not helping your team out there trying to be Superman!!! This is the Panthers 2nd straight loss. Newton was sacked twice. I think they should sit him down for a minute and let him regroup, but they won't. J Flacco threw for 327yds & 3 TDs. J. Forsett had 14 carries for 66yds & 1 TD. S. Smith, the man of the hour had 7 receptions for 139yds & 2 TDs and made his old team eat crow. C. Newton threw for 197yds & 1 TD. J. Cotchery had 5 receptions for 80yds.
TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS: 1-3
It's a tough fight staying in last place but it seems like that's where the Bucs are most at home. They do have company with their 1-3 start this year, remember who it is, I just talked about it. But, they did win their 1st game of the season this week against the Steelers, 27-24. Come on mannnnnn, yall can't beat the Bucs. The Bucs lost to ATL by 6 TDs more than a week ago but showed life by rallying from 7pts down in the 4th Qtr to give Lovie his first win at his second head coaching job. I am sure each and every time the Bucs hit the field, they have nothing to lose, those are the teams that will get you. You know they probably partied like it's 1999. They may not win anymore this season, but you can never tell with the slow starters. Lovie said, "I was out last year, so it's been a long time since I've tasted winning a game, we as a team, needed this." Coach Tomlin of the Steelers first said he wanted to compliment Coach Lovie & the Bucs, they did what was necessary to win. He said the bottom line is that we are an undisciplined group and we are too highly penalized and they need to fix that. M. Glennon threw for 302yds, 2 TDS & 1 int. D. Martin 14 carries for 40yds & 1 TD. L. Murphy had 6 receptions for 99yds and the whole team had kool-aid smiles after the game was over :o) Big Ben, is going down fast, he threw for 314yds & 3 TDs. L. Bell had 19 carries for 63yds & A. Brown had 7 receptions for 131yds & 2 TDs.
ATLANTA FALCONS: 2-2
Read about their 41-28 lashing in the Vikings update. But, they are tied with Carolina for first place, so they aren't doing to bad or is the NFC South is just that soft? You be the judge.
SEATTLE SEAHAWKS: 2-1
DID NOT PLAY.
SAN FRANCISCO 49'ERS: 2-2
Read about their stop to their losing streak with a 26-21 win over the Eagles in that update.
ARIZONA CARDINALS: 3 -0
DID NOT PLAY.. THE CARDINALS ARE ONE OF ONLY 2 UNDEFEATED TEAMS LEFT THIS SEASON.
ST. LOUIS RAMS: 1-2
DID NOT PLAY.
CINCINNATI BENGALS: 3-0
DID NOT PLAY.. THE BENGALS IS THE OTHER TEAM THAT IS STILL UNDEFEATED FOR THIS SEASON.
BALTIMORE RAVENS: 3-1
Read about their smashing of the Panthers, 38-10 in that update and how Steve Smith stole the day. The Ravens are 3-1 for the 5th time under Harbaugh. Each of the previous 4 times they started 3-1, they made the playoffs, but the last six times they started a season 3-1, they made the playoffs and twice won a super bowl. I'm just saying.
PITTSBURGH STEELERS: 2-2
Lost to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, 27-24, NUFF SAID. Read about it in the Bucs update.
CLEVELAND BROWNS: 1-2
DID NOT PLAY.
NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS:
Read about their embarrassing 41-14 beat down by the K.C. Chiefs in the MNF update.
What else is new, the Raiders lost again, this time to the Dolphins 38-14. To top it off, the went all the way to London for this beat down. The Raiders took the lead early in the 1st Qtr, outscoring the Dolphins 7-3. Well, that didn't last long. By the time half time came, the score was 24-7 and that was the beginning of the end of the Raiders for this game. I didn't get a chance to watch this one either. Oh yeah, btw, no budget for me for new tvs so I can watch more games, I did give it the ole college try, lol. Seriously though, did anyone think that the Raiders would win except the Raiders maybe. The Raiders showed some life at the beginning of the 2nd half when the Dolphins fumbled at the goal line and Charles Woodson recovered and gave possession back to them with ample time to do something with it. Then wouldn't you know it, the ugly monster, interception reared it's ugly head and the Dolphins ran it back deep into their neck of the woods and before you could say, hello, the Dolphins scored again, FG & bammmm, 31-7. I think we know how it ends folks, no need to drag out the apparent ending. Another slap in the face, Carr suffered an ankle and knee injury and was replaced midway through the 3rd Qtr by Matt McGloin. Again, snap, crackle and pop, another Dolphin TD, end of story, for real. The Raiders did score one more TD and headed off into their much needed bye week, we won't see them again until October 12th. From what I can tell the Dolphins had fins flying around everywhere. Tannehill still mad that he did not get endorsed as the starter so he put some extra stank on his game. Take that coach, I'm the starter whether you like it or not. He did not let any opportunities get away from him in this game. Then there are rumors flying that the Raiders head coach Dennis Allen might be fired. Give him a break Tannehill, the coach is not even sure if he still has a job, why should he tell you where your fate lies. R. Tannehill threw for 278yds, 2 TDs & 1 int. L. Miller had 12 carries for 64yds & 2 TDs and yes, 1 fumble. B. Hartline had 6 receptions for 74yards. D. Carr threw for 146yds, 1 TD & 1 int. J. Jones had 6 receptions for 83yds.
NEW YORK JETS:
Mosey on back up to the Detroit Lions update and read about how they feasted on the Jets to the tune of 24-17. Not a beat down, but a loss just the same.
Nothing much went right for the Bills this game against the Texans. Not only did they lose, 23-17. E.J. Manuel was replaced as starting QB by Kyle Orton, former Bears QB. Mannnn that's cold.
INDIANAPOLIS COLTS: 2-2
The Colts are who we thought they were!! LOL. I remember the coach of the Arizona Cardinals, Dennis Green, screaming that in a post game interview after the Bears came back to beat them after the Cardinals. He added a couple of other choice words too. Hilarioussssss. So, I'm saying all that to say, I guess the Luck/Colts are who everyone I hear saying they are. I'm still not convinced. Maybe Luck got that big ole rabbits foot from Shia LeBouf in Transformer 3. I'm just saying. It's gonna take a lot more than a blow out of the Titans for me to be a believer. The Colts answered the question on whether the 25yr old QB & 35yr old receiver, Reggie Wayne could get back in sync again. They did. Wayne had is first 100yd game and first TD of the season and Luck, well he just went rabbid with 393yds & 4 TDS. Luck did have 1 interception but hey, nobody's perfect. Luck has now thrown for 763yds & 8 TDs in the last 2 games. How can they only be 2-2 with those kinds of stats? See what I'm saying. The Titans are 1-3 and are not showing any signs of adding more games to the win column, we will see where they stand after Week 5. A. Luck threw for 393yds, 4 TDs & 1 int. T. Richardson had 20 carries for 47yd & 1 TD. Who does that, 20 carries & 47yds, that's about 2.3 yds per carry. SMH. R. Wayne had 7 receptions for 119yds & 1 TD. C. Whitehurst had 177yds, 1 TD & 1 int. D. Walker had 5 receptions for 84yds and 1 TD.
TENNESSEE TITANS: 1-3
Read about the constant fall of the Titans in the Colts update.
JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS: 0-4
Read about the expected 33-14 loss to the San Diego Chargers in that update.
HOUSTON TEXANS: 3-1
Not only can the Texans win this year, J.J. Watts can dance, block a pass by EJ Manuel, tip it to himself and run 80yds for a TD then jump back in line and play defense. Watts is the first player in NFL history to have 35 or more sacks and a TD receiving and an interception return in his career. I'm just saying, he da man right now!! He did get flagged twice for roughing the passer though. Going into Week 5 last year, the Texan were 2-3. I guess they said none of that this year, they are 3-1 and holding on to the AFC South with authority. They rolled over the Bills, 23-17. Buffalo was leading this game up until the interception by Watts. That one play turned the whole game around and woke up the Texan fans. It put them ahead 14-10 but it took 3 second half FGs to seal the deal. Ain't nobody every said that FGs don't count and the Texans proved that today. R. Fitzpatrick threw for 268yds, 1 TD & 2 ints. and to make it clear that he was not playing with the Bills, he had 5 carries for 14yds. A. Johnson had 6 receptions for 71yds & 1 fumble. E.J. Manuel threw for 225yds, 2 TDs & 2 ints. C. Spiller had 15 carries for 60yds. M. Williams gave it a winning effort with 2 receptions for 84yds & 1 TD.
DENVER BRONCOS: 2-1
DID NOT PLAY.
KANSAS CITY CHIEFS: 1-2
Read about their smack down of 41-14 over the New England Patriots in the MNF update.
SAN DIEGO CHARGERS: 3-1
Well, as expected, it was the Chargers turn to beat up on the Jaguars. They charged and ran over the Jaguars, 33-14. I mean really guys, what is there for me to really write about? We knew this was coming and so did the Jaguars. To be fair to the Jaguars, they have a new QB, Blake Bortles who just walked into this mess and he's a rookie, talk about training day!!! He had Jacksonville in the lead early but they could not hold on. This is the 5th straight loss in double digits for the Jaguars, going back to last seasons finale. They have been outscored 152-58 THIS season. Man, I wonder how many Jaguars jersey's are still being worn in public? Rivers got up there and showed the rookie QB how it's done. Rivers was on top of his game for this one. He had 3 TDS, 377yds & no interceptions. This was his 35th time throwing for 300+ yds and his 24th straight game throwing a TD. Rivers runs deep and thus the Chargers are 3-1. K. Allen had 10 receptions for 135yds. B. Bortles threw for 254yds, 1 TD & 2 ints., the little engine that could, or at least tried. T. Gerhart had 10 carries for 32yds, 1 TD & 1 fumble. C. Harbor had 8 receptions for 70 yds.
OAKLAND RAIDERS: 0-4
Read about the not so surprising lashing from the Dolphins, 38-14 in the Dolphins update.
* Continuing my feature presentation on the 25 most moronic players in NFL history. I give you moron's # 10-6. Again, this stuff is true*
# 10 - Adam Jones
Where do we begin with Adam Jones: Jones was on probation when he was drafted, then after the draft he was arrested for assault and felony vandalism. He was arrested again in 2006 after an incident at his house and then again during training camp that year for disorderly conduct and resisting arrest. His biggest mistake came during the 2007 NBA All-Star Game weekend where he was involved in a skirmish at a gentleman's club that led to 3 people being shot. While Jones was not the shooter, witnesses claimed the shooter was part of Jones entourage. My thoughts: What entourage is that, the one full of IDIOTS!!!
# 9 - Ben Rothlisberger
Big Ben should only be known for his two Super Bowls with the Pittsburgh Steelers. Unfortunately, Big Ben is more known for being accused twice of sexually assaulting women. The first incident happened in 2009 when a woman tried to get pregnant with a "little Roethlisberger:. That failed, so she tried to make some money by accusing him of sexual assault. A year later, Roethlisberger was investigated for sexual assault of a woman inside a nightclub bathroom.
# 8 - Richie Incognito
It's been well documented that Richie Incognito has some anger issues and they haven't subsided. He was a force on the field, but his anger issues got the best of him as he drew penalties left and right. Incognitos true moronic side showed itself this season after a disturbing incident came to light. Fellow teammate Jonathan Martin claimed Incognito sent him threatening and racially charged texts and voice mails.
# 7 - Plaxico Burress
Plaxico Burress was another NFL player who kept his nose clean for the most part. Sure he had the occasional driving violation or civil lawsuite, but nothing too moronic. That all changed on November 28, 2008, nine months after catching the game winning TD in Super Bowl XLll, when Burress like a moron, shot himself in the thigh in a New York City nightclub. The worst part is that the incident landed him in jail. My thoughts: He should be on the idiot list. I'm just saying.
# 6 - Titus Young
Titus Young easily made the moron list for being arrested 3 times in 5 days. But his moronic decisions started before that. In 2011, Young sucker punched Detroit Lions teammate Louis Delmas, then in a game during the 2012 season he deliberately lined up in the wrong position, twice. Young was arrested for suspected DUI on May 5, 2013. 14 hours later he was arrested again for trying to steal his car from the impound lot. Then, on May 10, he was arrested and charged with suspicion of burglary, resisting arrest, and assaulting an officer. My thoughts: lock him up already and call it a day!